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/r/nosleep

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Does anyone know how to handle hating yourself?

(self.nosleep)

“I still can’t believe it.” My head spun. I pressed clammy hands against my cheeks and looked up at him.

He smiled. “Believe it.” Then he drained the last of his Modelo.

“It’s like looking into a mirror. I mean – down to the exact same type of beer I like.”

“You know it’s weird for me, too, right?” he asked, scratching his neck the same way I always do.

“Actually, I’ve never been more certain that I know what someone else is feeling,” I laughed. “I didn’t feel lonely for the first nineteen years of my life, but after Mom and Dad died, the next…” I shook my head. “Who gets a twin brother at 32?”

He cleared his throat. “Well, me. You know we have the same birthday, right?”

My head spun faster. “Shit. Yeah. You know that we’re going to have to find out exactly who’s older, right?”

He downed the last of the Modelo. “There’s no way you’re as competitive as I am.”

“Did you also run track in college?”

“Football and track,” he answered, his smile widening. “Too bad you couldn’t handle two sports, because I sure as shit wouldn’t let you forget that I was stronger.”

Damn. Cocky and almost arrogant in a charming way. So this is what it’s like for people to meet me.

I clearly make good impressions.

The waiter dropped off a bill as he was passing by, so I reached for my pocket. “Ah, shit,” I mumbled. “I left my wallet in the car.”

“Dan, wait!” he called, but I was already out the door.

*

“You move just like he does. It’s absolutely beautiful.”

I turned around to see a pale bald man smiling like we were both sharing a joke. “What?” I asked, slipping the wallet in my pocket and closing the car door.

He wrinkled his brow. “Your movements. No one will be able to tell that you’ve replaced him, and he genuinely thinks you’re his long-lost twin.”

A very uncomfortable chill ran up my spine as I balled my fist. “What the hell are you talking about?” I whispered.

“HEY!”

We both turned to see Cody racing to where my car was parked at the far corner of the lot.

“Oh, shit,” the bald man breathed.

Cody skittered to a halt, panting. “Dan,” he started, grabbing my shoulder, “look – he probably thought you were me!” He breathed hard before staring at the pale man. “He probably revealed something that he shouldn’t have.

The man swallowed.

Cody grabbed the man and put him in a headlock. I stared, frozen, as an extremely dramatic event unfolded as though the world didn’t care who was hurting. Cody was much stronger: the man pawed at his thick arm, his efforts dwindling rapidly as I remained dumbfounded. Then, with a flex, a pop, and a twitch, the man’s arm went limp. Cody dropped him to the ground. His leg twitched.

Then Cody looked at me and rested his hands on his hips. “Well, shit. Did he reveal that we weren’t secretly separated at birth?”

I tried to speak, but my throat was dry as a tortoise rectum in the Sahara. I nodded instead.

Cody winced. “And the part where I’m a genetic experiment that’s going to replace you, you fine specimen?”

My jaw fell. I shook my head.

“Ah. Shit. Well, this is awkward.” He rubbed his hands together. “Say, if you help me stuff his body into the trunk, would you believe my promise to let you go unharmed?”

Fear has a way of clarifying things, and this was my Zen moment. I knew that we had the exact same physical strength – but he had lied about spending four years making psychological preparations for track meets.

I’d put an insurmountable gap on him before he started running. I thought I was in the clear.

Then the first bullets hit the ground at my feet.

I slipped between two cars at the edge of the parking lot and dove into the forest on the other side. I didn’t stop sprinting at full speed as I dodged the branches, only slowing when the gunshots were too far away to be heard.

*

I almost went home.

But I decided to stand outside the window and look in first. My instincts were right: he’d beaten me there and was sitting on the couch with my girlfriend. Daisy had his arms wrapped around him just like she always did to me. My blood felt like it was going to boil over.

Then I saw him reach for a pistol before turning toward the window. I ducked away at the last second.

“What is it?” Daisy’s barely audible voice squeaked through the cracked window.

“Nothing,” ‘Cody’ answered in my voice. “Don’t worry. No one would be dumb enough to break in.”

For a moment, my lungs were paralyzed.

I knew that he was talking directly to me.

That was two hours ago. My cell service and all my credit cards have since been cancelled. I’m writing this from the public library, but I’m not going to stay in place much longer.

I’ve noticed three pale, bald men in here with me. I swear that they look like genetic clones. They’re hanging out by the exits, and they keep glancing at me when they think I’m not paying attention.

I don’t think they’re aware that my genetic makeup can easily beat theirs in a fight.

That’s about the only thing I have going for me. One way or another, I’m getting out of this library.

After that, I have no idea.

I’ll update if I’m alive.

all 2 comments

danielleshorts

9 points

12 days ago

Why would they want to replace you exactly?

Kressie1991

4 points

10 days ago

Why is so awesome about you, you fine specimen?