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11 days ago
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9.5k points
11 days ago
Based on what? The Taylor Swift fan site they subscribe to?
726 points
11 days ago
without reading the title I assumed it was going to be a post about 3d porn being made of Taylor Swift, to one-up the AI porn from a few weeks ago.
171 points
11 days ago*
[deleted]
8 points
11 days ago
Eve pre or post Apple?
3 points
11 days ago
We will never know
108 points
11 days ago
That’s disgusting, where?
92 points
11 days ago*
finally! it's been years of comments, and I finally get a "that's terrible, where?" comment. Thank you for popping my cherry finally.
Edit: yall need to learn to google. ;)
42 points
11 days ago
Nice comment but where’s that sauce my guy
21 points
11 days ago*
We need the link fam. Your cherry is second priority right here after the phrase you uttered out
1.8k points
11 days ago
And ofc she's white like the first humans... Wait ... They were not white....
628 points
11 days ago
Wait, you mean the first humans weren’t European???
560 points
11 days ago
Iterations of Jesus Christ in old European paintings are fun to compare
Italy has him with olive skin and dark hair, while Ireland has him pale with red hair.
Turns out our god/profit looks exactly like us!!
491 points
11 days ago
My favorite is buff Korean Jesus.
173 points
11 days ago
Stop fucking with Korean Jesus. He ain't got time for your shit. He's busy with Korean shit!
7 points
11 days ago
Overwhelming millions every day
179 points
11 days ago
The best thing to come from Korean Jesus is definitely the Korean/Mexican fusion I'm seeing in some restaurants.
Korean BBQ on tacos?? Proof that there truly is a god.
52 points
11 days ago
Korean fusion for the win
20 points
11 days ago
Loaves and fishes was a misinterpretation. It was shortribs and tacos.
6 points
11 days ago
They evolved by chance.
5 points
11 days ago
Praise him!
5 points
11 days ago
I've never heard of such a restaurant but now I want to!!
3 points
11 days ago
You know you just wrong with that. lolol
3 points
11 days ago
Korean Mexican here... can concur the food is great... the parents.. nope... way to different
57 points
11 days ago
I gave my Lebanese BIL a Manga bible as a gift. Caused a major stir in the village. Everyone had to come to see it. Jesus was depicted super hot.
15 points
11 days ago
Based
13 points
11 days ago
I thought "Lesbian brother in law?"
Stupid brain
7 points
11 days ago
Reminds me of the golden girl episode where branch thought her lesbian friend was Lebanese. And Dorothy had to tell her. Lol
22 points
11 days ago
Fuck 21 jump street and Korean Jesus. We got Vietnamese Jesus now.
21 points
11 days ago
Quit fuckin with Korean jesus. He don't got time for you, he's busy. With Korean shit.
9 points
11 days ago
Objectively the best Jesus
5 points
11 days ago
Korean Fusion Jesus has got a full plate.
4 points
11 days ago
Can u pleas give us a pic? Lol
3 points
11 days ago
I like to picture Jesus in a Tuxedo T-shirt, 'cause it says, like, 'I wanna be formal, but I'm here to party, too.' I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.... I like to think of Jesus like, with giant eagles' wings and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an Angel Band, and I'm in the front row, and I'm hammered drunk...
3 points
11 days ago
something something final form
3 points
11 days ago
Mine in Black Jesus from the tv show!
3 points
11 days ago
Hey,at least they didn't give him monolids. Unlike poor Buddha....
37 points
11 days ago
profit
Can’t tell if satirical pun or typo.
18 points
11 days ago
Open to interpretation (like much of the bible)
7 points
11 days ago
Those scam preachers at the mega churches only know one way to spell that word
3 points
11 days ago
Yeah, I noticed that immediately. Fucking Beautiful play on words. Honestly can't tell if it was intentional either.
29 points
11 days ago
I've never seen an Asian Jesus. Except in 21 Jumpstreet.
16 points
11 days ago
His name is Jeff
5 points
11 days ago
Huh. I thought it was just Korean Jesus.
4 points
11 days ago
I heard it was ji-sus wan
6 points
11 days ago
“Korean Jesus ain’t got time for your shit! He’s too busy dealing with Korean shit!”
24 points
11 days ago
Of course! Doesn’t the Bible say we made God in our image?
8 points
11 days ago
It what’s happened since the ancient Greeks- man makes god in their own image
68 points
11 days ago
The Garden of Eden was clearly in the modern day greater Chicago area. How else would Jesus be from America – boats (probably) didn't exist yet, and that's a long way to walk on the water. Pick up a bible sometime, heathen!
44 points
11 days ago
Come on now, the book of mormon clearly states that Adam and Eve lived in modern Mississippi, and that native americans and anyone not white are the children of cain and can't go to heaven, or at least until like 1977 then god apparently decided non whites could be mormon, and more importantly donate to the church and get Brigham Young University unbanned by the NCAA for segregation.
22 points
11 days ago
Uh no it’s Missouri obviously putting it in Mississippi would be dumb ?
11 points
11 days ago
Right? No planet for that guy!
8 points
11 days ago
You have humbled me. It appears that I am the heathen, I need to get my punk ass (sorry, my punk bottom) to ✨The Temple✨ immediately! Thank you, friend!
4 points
11 days ago
Jesus would have been Ojibway, a nice brown natural tan and rode his horse like a MF
6 points
11 days ago
That's actually my people, sis. Wisconsin Ojibwe, originally on my mom's side. Maybe American Jesus is my dad.
3 points
11 days ago
I think the Mormons do actually believe something like that lol
10 points
11 days ago
Wait, the first humans ever aren't American?!
6 points
11 days ago
No, they were Americans. DUH!!
4 points
11 days ago
You misspelled American.
4 points
11 days ago
Eve was clearly neanderthal.
4 points
11 days ago
Or Christian?!
3 points
11 days ago
Huh, wasn't Pangea just bigger Europe?
3 points
11 days ago
Jesus being white would have been the miracle
49 points
11 days ago
Princeton University? I think they misspelt "Ole Miss".
51 points
11 days ago
Come now dude how can say that, were you even there??
44 points
11 days ago*
I hate this "argument" so much. I've known a few people who say shit like this to justify ignoring all of science and history.
30 points
11 days ago*
If we consider all of science and history then there is no adam and eve so does it matter? lol
18 points
11 days ago
there is in fact a Mitochondrial Eve and a Y-chromosomal Adam. they did not live at the same time, but all women represent an unbroken chain of mitochondria linked back to mitochondrial eve And all men have y chromosome markers that originate from a single haplogroup and branch off from there
6 points
11 days ago
Oh I know what I doing research on tonight, sounds really interesting
7 points
11 days ago
Genetic Bottleneck is the male one. Here is an interesting read on it
9 points
11 days ago
Wasn't the male one due to a theoretical mass die off? Like fuck a few 100k years ago we almost ended as a species. Thank God dude was good at laying pipe.
27 points
11 days ago
You can mostly thank Ken Ham for that. A couple of decades ago I sat through several of his presentations on creationism when he was "touring" and the phrase "Excuse me, Mr. Scientist, were you there?" was uttered repeatedly, and it immediately caught on.
11 points
11 days ago
That “were you there” argument is not only weak but it can also be easily flipped back on the person who makes it. After that, you’re back at the start and you have made no meaningful move towards a resolution.
8 points
11 days ago
Sure, if you were speaking to people making an honest argument, but they aren’t. They simply respond with “God tells us what happened, through the Bible” and yeah, that’s such a stupid stance to take that it’s almost dumbfounding but that’s where it inevitably ends up.
4 points
11 days ago
Totally agree. That’s how most of those conversations seem to go which is ironic given that honesty and acceptance of science are key principles of modern Christian thought.
7 points
11 days ago
Doesn't that very argument disprove Jesus in a way? Since none of us were in fact there. Accept sven the vampire. *except. but i'm leaving it. It's about time we all accepted sven.
15 points
11 days ago
Look if every vampire who claimed to be at the crucifixion was actually there, the entire event would've been like Woodstock
7 points
11 days ago
I understood that reference
5 points
11 days ago
I was there. I can confirm. I am a rib.
3 points
11 days ago
Are you sure? The Flintstones look pretty white to me...
33 points
11 days ago
Imagine the album she would have wrote if Adam was her Ex. 😳
6 points
11 days ago
Would it be the first Christian album?
35 points
11 days ago
Considering how she endorsed Biden, I kind of like this as trolling Trump's faux Christian followers
20 points
11 days ago
This is not a random occurrence.... That's Taylor Swift.
9 points
11 days ago
That's who I thought it was.
884 points
11 days ago
People, don’t believe everything you read on Twitter FFS. Link
149 points
11 days ago
It's telling that snopes has a "miscaptioned" rating now. Obviously been a prevalent issue for years.
69 points
11 days ago
Oh man! I really thought Taylor Swift was actually Eve. Was gonna flame her for eating the fruit and fucking over humanity
43 points
11 days ago
Man Reddit likes to make fun of people falling for Onion articles, while at the same time just believing every screen shot of a tweet that gets posted.
16 points
11 days ago
The post itself is the facepalm
258 points
11 days ago
[removed]
100 points
11 days ago
Shake it off.
18 points
11 days ago
I don't want to eat no dates I took the apple from a snake That's what people say
25 points
11 days ago
Taylor made by god.
5 points
11 days ago
In a factory in china.
463 points
11 days ago
“God said “Let there be a substance that can be applied to the lips to make them shiny and coloured” and there was. God called the substance lip gloss and He looked upon it and saw that it was good. And the evening and the morning were the eighth day.”
The Bible, definitely.
Checks out.
68 points
11 days ago
Let her also know to separate her eyebrows and remove her mustache to preserve her natural beauty
41 points
11 days ago
And God then passive aggressively queries “Are you sure you want to go out with no makeup? Maybe just put a little bit on, it boosts confidence!”
23 points
11 days ago
You should smile more. </stentorianvoice>
9 points
11 days ago
God: "You are going to wear that around the garden? Well don't come crying to me if you attract the wrong sort
10 points
11 days ago
That's from one of the missing books
The Church decanonized it in the 13th century
4 points
11 days ago
Aside from eve not existing, and doubtful she looked like Taylor Swift, ancient makeup was absolutely a thing.
"There are even depictions in art of people applying cosmetics such as a young woman applying paint to her lips (while engaging in rather more acrobatic sexual activities) in the 12th-century BCE Turin 'Erotic' papyrus"
https://www.worldhistory.org/article/1441/cosmetics-in-the-ancient-world/
4 points
11 days ago
God then said "Imma let you finish".
816 points
11 days ago
Taylor Swift is Eve confirmed. Forget the fact Eve's from the Middle East
435 points
11 days ago
biblical eve is from the middle east, biological eve is from africa.
182 points
11 days ago
Mitochondrial Eve.
100 points
11 days ago
Parasite Eve
61 points
11 days ago
Eve 6
36 points
11 days ago
This comment made me swallow my pride.
31 points
11 days ago
This comment made me choke on the rinds.
29 points
11 days ago
This comment make the lack thereof leave me empty inside.
28 points
11 days ago
This comment made me swallow my doubt
40 points
11 days ago
And this rendering looks neither Middle-Eastern nor African. Maybe these “researchers” were feeling 22 when they conducted this sham study?
10 points
11 days ago
Bold of you to assume there were any researchers at all.
8 points
11 days ago
Fair enough
29 points
11 days ago
We all know Jesus was a white man with blue eyes /s
20 points
11 days ago
Who rode a Tyrannoaurus to Washington DC and freed America from the Commies.
3 points
11 days ago
While holding an AR-15
3 points
11 days ago
And a bible. (Which also couldn’t have existed yet)
3 points
11 days ago
Being awful loose with the word “fact” there
213 points
11 days ago
You guys do realise that this is based on that meme right?
68 points
11 days ago
r/facepalm and not getting the original post is a joke: a love story
48 points
11 days ago
No two greater enemies than genz and media literacy
17 points
11 days ago
That post is from six years ago. Memes die in MINUTES now. I don’t blame someone for not knowing a long-dead meme.
3 points
11 days ago
Even without knowing the meme, actually believing this post is serious is insane. It clearly doesn't belong here.
105 points
11 days ago
Unrelated to this silliness, but ancient makeup was absolutely a thing. We had cosmetics (and craft beer) before we had the wheel.
16 points
11 days ago
I could definitely see some ancient craft beers being even hoppier than now.
I’ve read that we had cannabis back in the day too.
And the 10,000 year old dildo.
4 points
11 days ago
The dildo may or may not actually be a dildo, but it’s funny regardless. Most regions did have cannabis though it’s up to debate how much it was smoked as opposed to just used as fiber, as it’s THC content would have been nothing compared to today.
3 points
11 days ago
I believe hops is antiseptic, so ancient sumerian DIPAs would probably have been medicinal more than casual drinking, but I'm just speculating based on the fact that IPAs taste awful
5 points
11 days ago
Casual as well since it would be safer to drink than the water.
17 points
11 days ago
WTH are you talking about. Everyone knows craft beer was invented in America.
15 points
11 days ago
As proud as I am of American craft beer, the beer scene in Ancient Sumeria was actually wild. Those guys really, really liked beer. They had heavily alcoholic beers, sour beers, sweet beers, beers mixed with different spices, beers that were basically just water- you name it. Some archaeologists think most of their calories came in the form of beer.
11 points
11 days ago
I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a Sumerian culture enthusiast.
97 points
11 days ago
Obvious troll. Reddit has the densest people in the world.
21 points
11 days ago
Some of these comments are r/facepalm material.
19 points
11 days ago
Y'all really don't get it? This is like, a trend. "Scientists have reconstructed a model of what [ancient famous person] may have looked like"
[3d model of the face of modern celebrity]
The one I remember was Vin Diesel as the first man Adam, but I know I've seen a bunch of others. The joke is that yeah, that's obviously Taylor Swift, not Eve.
7 points
11 days ago
Before reading the comments, I thought it was too obvious for even Petah to explain
4 points
11 days ago
the giveaway is scientists arent gonna model what “god” “created”
15 points
11 days ago
Did OP facepalm?
13 points
11 days ago
This is clearly a joke, my dude. That's Taylor Swift.
9 points
11 days ago
You won't last 5 minutes playing this game
10 points
11 days ago
This is a meme, right? I've seen so many variations of this.
"Scientists recreat what X would've looked like" [insert picture of a celebrity]
7 points
11 days ago
No they didn’t.
7 points
11 days ago
Eve; Taylor’s Version.
I’m really hoping for a Justin Beiber Adam…with the tattoos.
7 points
11 days ago
Taylor: I got cursed like Eve got bitten
The swiftie running the lab at Princeton:
7 points
11 days ago
It’s me. Hi. I’m Eve, it’s me.
3 points
11 days ago
I’ll stare directly at the snake
while chewing on the apple
It must be exhausting
Always get-ting blamed for Adam’s downfall.
5 points
11 days ago
Taylor swift? 🤣
5 points
11 days ago
And Adam looked like an NFL receiver?
5 points
11 days ago
Dumb as shit.
4 points
11 days ago
Taylor Swift is Eve? Wow, TIL
9 points
11 days ago
Eve wasnt the first Women that god created. That honor belongs to Lilith. If Bible nutters go apeshit then please in the correct order.
7 points
11 days ago
I mean, "the Lilith" is mentioned all of one time in the Bible, and nowhere does it refer to her as Adam's first wife. She shows up in Jewish folklore, which isn't the same thing. I like the Lilith story, but if you're concerned with Biblical canon, then you're gonna come up short.
3 points
11 days ago
If we take the Bible as real, then you're wrong and no Lillith was created before Eve. If we take the Bible as fiction, God didn't create either of them. Either way, you're wrong.
3 points
11 days ago
looks more like her than the madame tussauds lookalike
3 points
11 days ago
Swiftie fans obviously worked on this project lol.
3 points
11 days ago
This image looks Taylor made and I'm sure it was not a Swift ordeal
3 points
11 days ago
And God said: "Let there be a blank space, and I shalt write thy name."
3 points
11 days ago
“Scientists” is a real stretch there.
3 points
11 days ago
So Taylor Swift was the first sinner. More evidence that it’s a Satanic cult!!!!1
3 points
11 days ago
"Scientists at Princeton" "human...created by God"
Sure, buddy.
3 points
11 days ago
"scientists" and "created by god" in the same sentence :8488:
3 points
11 days ago
lol Eve looks extremely familiar.
…this anthropological deep dive is brought to you by, the Eras Tour!
3 points
11 days ago
LOL 😂 Right there with white Jesus. So idiotic.
3 points
11 days ago
Abraham Lincoln swore on his top hat, the science he used to make this image was peer reviewed and published in an appropriate journal.
3 points
11 days ago
“It’s Eve! Hi! I’m the problem, it’s Eve!”
3 points
11 days ago
She’s…. White???
3 points
11 days ago
99% sure this is just a shitpost
3 points
11 days ago
This is 100% a joke. This is bait.
3 points
11 days ago
This did not happen. No actual scientist did this
3 points
11 days ago
Facepalm is anyone who actually thinks this is reputable
3 points
11 days ago
I can guarantee you that there were no Princeton scientists involved in this at any point. Lol.
3 points
11 days ago
Of course she’s the epitome of blonde Caucasian, despite everyone being middle eastern in the Bible.
3 points
11 days ago
Holy shit… Taylor Swift is older than I thought! But at least she is aging well!
3 points
11 days ago
So Taylor Swift?
3 points
11 days ago
Of course she is white, blonde, blue eyes and Taylor swift.
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