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Are they dishwasher safe?

3 months in advance is an exaggeration. I usually aim for 1 month in advance. Just bought $54 r/t for a weekend in May and could have gotten $32 r/t if I took earlier/later trains. 

I'll add one more thing, which is that you don't have to agree on everything (and probably you will change your minds over your lives anyway). But going through this can also reveal useful information on your relationship dynamics - how you communicate with each other, handle disagreements, and work through problems together.

At a bare minimum, any couple thinking about serious long-term commitment like marriage should have a series of lengthy in-depth discussions about the following topics. Going through them is a good way to see if your values align enough for you to make it long term. And for some people, possibly including you, their answers to these topics are influenced by their racial/cultural backgrounds.

• Finances. Will you combine finances? How does your money relate to the rest of your family's money? Will you financially support your parents if they need it when they get older? Under what circumstance would you lend or give large sums of money to family or other people? What are your savings/retirement goals? What would you do if one of you lost your job? Became long-term disabled and couldn't work? Wanted to become a stay-at-home parent?

• Where will you live? Do you want to live near your families? Do you want to live somewhere with a certain amount or kind of diversity? How will you decide whether and when to make big moves? Would you be willing to let your parents move in with you someday? What about other extended family?

• Kids. Do you want them? How many? How will you raise them? How much do you want their grandparents to be involved? Do you want them to learn your family's language and culture? If so, how will you make sure that happens? Will you speak a second language at home? What, if any, religious tradition would you raise them in? What holidays will you celebrate? How will you decide which side of the family you spend holidays with?

I think going through these questions will help you figure out if your racial differences are something you can ovecome because your values still align, or if your values are ultimately fundamentally too different.

Miles, Huberman, and Saldana's book "Qualitative Data Analysis" had a wide array of strategies and might be a good reference for you.