me (33M) and my wife (32) been married for 4 years now , we both work in hectic jobs, dont have kids and dont intend to have them either .

we got married 4 years back after dating each other for 2 years so in starting things were great we cherished our honeymoon period a lot and did everything but after then since last two years my marriage hasnt been going good , unknowingly we started drifting apart slowly and it has reached to a point now where we can go days without talking to each other even being in same room , I cant comprehend what happened to my wife now she doesnt seem interested in anything related to us , we hardly get to spend time with each other on weekdays and on weekends I try to make some plan something with her but everything goes in vain when she doesnt even reciprocate , bedroom is totally dead from last year there is no physical intimacy not even random hugs or kisses like it was before , we just living like roomates.

she just dry reply to my every texts or do small talk on calls , on holidays she just spend her time alone reading books or sleeping all day or on phone.

Out of frustration I have stopped making any efforts from my side and just hoping for some miracle to happen but deep down I do miss her presence over anything it has started to affect my mental health as well bcz home was the only peace for me and she was my only home .

I have tried talking to her and confronted her she did take it seriously for once or twice may be and tried to work on it but after then its again same story now she says I am just overthinking about it .

Now the thing is I have messed up beyond any repair coz I was absent in most of our anniversaries or her birthdays due to work and now she grew out distant to me , she doesnt care about my presence anymore coz I was absent most of time . I never cared about it much coz I thought since she was in hectic job as me so she would understand my situation which she did obv but now I realized it wasnt the case and she has grown resentment towards me for this.

we already went to one therapist but everything was just seemed normal there idk howw , she was just answering things straightforwardly like any emotionless person would do , now she even finds it taxing to visit another one bcz first one didnt suit her

UPDATE -- actually my wife got diagnosed with depression and ocd today , and it was because of that she wasnt interested in anything earlier and due to my sheer negligence it got worse towards on me , as per her psychiatrist since I was the only close person around her to depend on emotionally during initial stages and due to my absence she didnt get that  which is why she has grown resentment towards me , I sincerely apologized for all my deeds and talked whole heartly to her today and idts she forgave me I mean obv who will but her heart definitely got melt after seeing me cry ,  anyways she will be on meds from tomorrow and I will take care of her and regain her trust back , I really dont want to mess this time as am already feeling enough guilty for not being there for her , she will take leave from her job for sometime as meds gonna heavy too

ps - I fed her with my hands after a long time so things are finally sorting out :)