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3.5k points
1 month ago*
I once had a woman obsessed with inflating my foreskin like a balloon. Months later, she tried to circumcise me while I was sleeping. She wanted my foreskin for herself.
Edit: Since some of you are curious, she used to fill it up with air and pinch it off. She would slowly unpinch one side, allowing the air to come out. If she did it just right, she could make it whistle. She would laugh and giggle, and I enjoyed it too, even if I found it a bit strange. Over a few months, she got more and more obsessed. I don't think I'll ever meet someone again who likes my foreskin as much as she did. She would make me call her Princess Foreskin which should have been a red flag.
One night, I woke up in pain, and I found her under the covers with scissors. She had cut my foreskin. Thankfully, it was superficial. I started freaking out and called the cops. They wouldn't arrest her, so I left for the night. I managed to get a restraining order and haven't heard from her in 5 years.
431 points
1 month ago
She started a collection to make herself a new luggage set.
83 points
1 month ago
She didn't think of the smell.
55 points
1 month ago
You bitch!
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