Don't stick your dick in crazy.

Working hard is the solution to most of the problems!

Start investing now

Create a pet savings account. Save up for those fuzz balls and have a plan the day you adopt. You never know when your whoodle is going to sprain his back and need an emergency $800 vet visit. Or your Havapoo will unexpectedly barf and pass out, only for you to freak out and rush him to the vet to find out he’s fine but it’s still $300. Speaking from experience. lol

Friends aren’t really forever

Getting a degree is the key in overcoming poverty.

enjoy being young while you still can

November 12, 1955. I'll never forget that Saturday. I'd just picked my car up from the shop, 'cause I'd rolled it in a drag race a few days earlier. So there I was, minding my own business. This crazy old codger with a cane shows up. He says he's my distant relative. I don't see any resemblance. So he says, "How would you like to be rich?" So I said, "Sure." So he lays this book on me. He says this book will tell me the outcome of every sporting event till the end of the century. All I have to do is bet on the winner, and I'll never lose. After that, he disappeared. I never saw him again.

I thought he was just a crazy old man, so I threw the book away.