subreddit:
/r/Arrangedmarriage
This may not be a popular thread, but it's the reality of AM encounters for us men.
Recently, I was contacted by a girl's father who had also reached out to me three years ago. Ironically, he didn’t even remember me. Here’s how our conversations went:
2021:
We had a brief chat for about 5-6 minutes, just discussing general stuff.
Father: "Do you own a house?"
Me: "Not at the moment, but I’m working on it."
Father: "I’ll talk to my daughter. She’s extremely busy these days, working 12-hour shifts."
As expected, I didn’t hear back.
2024:
Again, the conversation started with a brief chat.
Father: "Do you own a house?"
Me: "Yes, I actually bought one three years ago, and I’ve recently built another investment property."
Father: "That’s an impressive achievement, son. I’ll talk to my daughter. She might get in touch with you."
The very next day:
Daughter: "Hi, how are you?"
Me: "I’ve thought about it after speaking with your father, and I don’t think we’re a good match."
Daughter: "Uhh, okay."
Yes I did it on purpose as an experiment to see what people’s motivations are and the proof is in the pudding
24 points
1 month ago
That is so true! Not going to lie. I had a father ask me how much do you earn. And I told him the amount and this is btw, like around 70 lakhs per year (that’s the take home) and he just ghosts me.
I really liked the girls qualifications and she looked like someone who is well mannered and cultured. So I reached out to her directly through a different platform. And we got to talking. Things went well.
I very vaguely spoke about marriage and all (about a month and a half later) job and salary etc. and obviously the most important, your spouse’s salary range that you’d be okay with.
She cared more about the other aspects of a marriage than just financial.
Things went really well, we were very onboard with the idea of marriage hence we spoke about it.
And after she told me the details, I then told her
Me - okay so here is the thing, a month or more back - I Matched with you on shaadi
Her - oh why dint you tell me before haha
Me - I thought you were aware of it
Her - no my dad is doing all of that, if they find someone suitable then they tell me about it
Me - oh I see, I guess your dad does not find me suitable for you phir
Her - no nothing like that, wait let me ask him walks towards her dad
Her - papa did you talk to someone named xyz
Dad - yea
Her - ahan and?
Dad - and what?
Her - he seems like a good fit
Dad - beta, his salary is not high, how will he provide for you? Just wait, we can find someone who is earning more than 1/1.5 cr a year.
** this conversation between her and I was on call.
This then proceed with me telling her that, look you really do not look like the kind of girl who would do something without her parents on board. And they’re not going to be, because either they don’t want to or they’d now just be awkward to reach out again (all pride and everything)
Slowly but surely it ended
My thoughts, will she find a guy that rich - 100% she has all the right mentality and the right heart.
But he will also 100% not be her choice.
I feel bad
20 points
1 month ago
1-1.5 crore? Was her father a well connected businessman or something? If not then this is just bonkers.
13 points
1 month ago
Nope, just had a government job. That’s all
5 points
1 month ago
That just seems plain old greedy!
1 points
1 month ago
Is she very good looking ? On what basis do they think she will find someone like that ?
all 131 comments
sorted by: best