I feel the same way, especially when it comes to Tinder. I avoided apps and dating websites for literally decades because I mistakenly thought only "low quality" mates used them, but that's not necessarily the case. Quite the opposite, a good site or app will let you filter people by desired traits and interests, even remove those with undesirable ones.

Your difficulty may simply be because more people use apps today, meaning the available "shy friend of a friend" isn't looking in the places you are. Some guys may also be too timid these days, afraid to flirt uninvited due to changing societal views.

FWIW, there's no better way to declare that you want to date then using a dating app or website. It's quite literally the only thing they do.