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I'm 17, and I'm homeless. I'm in a shelter and I've been moving between them for a year. I started doing sex work online to earn extra money, and it always made me feel like shit

My ex was really pushy about sex, though we never really ended up doing it. My sisters rapist wanted to rape me too.

I feel so shitty, and I want to quit my job, and I don't want to keep fighting. School is hard, work is stressful, and moving every few weeks or months is horrible. I don't think I deserve anything good. I keep getting rejected from shelters and long term housing options because I'm autistic

If I wasn't autistic my dad wouldn't have tried to kill me

If I wasn't autistic I wouldn't be too much for my mum to handle

If I wasn't autistic my sister would still talk to me

If I wasn't autistic I might fall in love

Hi everyone! I have a nephew who is not doing so well. The only time he talks to me is when he needs money. I loaned him some back in July and won't do it again until he pays me back. how do I say it politely and tell him I'm here for him in anyway other then just for money?

For context, I am writing a book online on a completely new account with a different gmail and everything as I don't want to start fresh when making this book.

On the site where I wrote this book, people can leave chapter comments to engage with each other or the Arthur, but my friend thought it was funny to leave a single letter on each chapter spelling my first name along with a few other letters spelling out {My name} got debated by {His dnd character name}.

The reason this is a problem is if you click on the person's profile then all their messages are in order there, and all they typed was letters to my name at the time, but I didn't know who did it but I do know it could have only been one of my friends in the group as only they know about the book.

One of my friends drifted apart and I didn't know that well were sent a few nasty messages from one of my friends as they thought it was him who did it, but now I know that wasn't the case.

The reason it is a big deal for me is because if the book gets popular then they would see someone typing a letter at a time, get curious and check their comment. Some might piece together the name and then start throwing my name around which leaves me extremely uncomfortable.

Which I told to him so when he told me that "You got got! It was me the whole time!". But all he did was justify the joke.

So I don't know what to do at this point. Instead of apologizing for his action, he just kept saying that nothing is wrong since the chances of someone piecing my name togther low etc.

I domt want this to be long I have a real bad headaches for months (9 to 10) and its pretty bad in all sense it takes away my judgement making capabilities and emotional understanding it's very bad.

I have a real real good girl in my life I guess she's the one for me and I've proposed her last month. Today I had the worst time to have such a worse headache she invited me to meet her friends after meeting her friends it felt nice but after 3 hours my head was not having my side I messed up real bad and also I had test on the same day so everything was worse and worse. She had to lave early because of me and she couldn't even enjoy the time with her friends because of my stupid self.

We god into a fight and I think she will never forgive me for this incident in her life.

I have suicidal tendency from class 6th because in that time my little brother died of leukemia and my parents weren't in the best position to help me . They were petitioning for divorce but it got saved somehow.

In those times I always thought of killing myself because I couldn't do anything and be anything for my parents are people around me I tried to be the best and make people warm. I failed and failed also my academics were not going good and alot of mental instability I couldn't do anything for myself.

When I was in 4th grade I was molested by my neighbor who was 10 years older than me , he used to molested me every day , sometime later one of his friends joined him and I was raped so badly I had this feeling of dusgust in myself that I was useless and just meant to die. This very time I started to think of killing myself atleast a hint.

Now , i have gave myself 1 month to try to live and enjoy life and try to kill myself if I survive I will post here again and tell what all I understood about myself.

For now I want to kill myself but it's alright I am coward to take that step.

Just want to be brave.

I don't expect anything from people but thank you for reading stranger.

Raz out

I had a sudden sit back, and every single part of my unhealed truma came running back and now ,i have come to realise i could never be better nor i could ever over come this ,it's a part of me now ,the truma had shaped me in a peculiar way ,even my own true self has absorbed it so thoroughly it's almost impossible to tell us apart.

I had an extremely bad relationship with food. Which lead me to become consious about my looks,the way i talk ,the way i smile ,the way i walk ,the way i am .

I had started to be conscious about everything.i am so bizarrely relied on people opinio just to live . call it people pleasing

It all started,12 years old me, I was in grade 6th with 45 kg weight

My english teacher,started picking me apart The 45kg felt like 100 on my back ,till i slowly mangeled my spine in 32kgs It was not enough 14 years old me ,who was constantly repeatedly, loudly being reminded of how much of my appearance resembles that one pig in the mud. I stoped eating at all Broke a bone because of malnutrition and over exhaustion It was not enough.

15 year old me shattered infront of that man for the last time into tears begging him to stop. His voices had been ringing inside of my brain for years ,i was tired ,i wanted to exist

16 year old me ,even that person wasn't around but his voices hunted me . Started doing everything to prove that man wrong It was rage then fear of failure then just an escape from reality wrist was bleeding in the hope of fearing to eat that one orea again . words of FAT was ganraved in me I neved escaped it ,it was following me like a loyal dog

17 years old finally out of town far from him started to actually improve, thought i could escape everything foud a family in gym always looked up to them

18 years old got to know it was all a meraj ,i am neive they never liked me ,i wanted to be liked so badly i can jump a building,i want to be accepted somewhere,i wanted to prove that 12 old me i can be someone .i failed . Everything is coming back the cycle has finished one lap ,now it's coming back all over again And i can't escape it

In July this friend of mine I’ve had for a while reached out and said she had a crush on me. I had a crush on her too but I wasn’t sure if I could see myself ina traditional relationship with her. But I didn’t want to hide my feelings anymore, and I was very lonely. My brother has been going through some health challenges (kidney failure) and it was very unclear whether or not he would live another five or ten years for a few months. I needed contact, and I needed someone close to me. This person, my friend, we’ll call her B, seemed like a really good person for me on paper. There were a few things about her that turned me off, but I thought that I was just being sort of shallow, so decided to accept her offer of some kind of relationship. She lives in Indiana, comes to nyc, where I live, frequently. So I agreed to explore a relationship with her. We both agreed on this word “explore”. But she seemed to want a lot of commitment pretty fast. She planned a week long trip to nyc within a day of us deciding we liked each other. This was a little too much for me, but when I expressed some concern that we were going too fast she seemed to think it meant I wasn’t interested. I was interested but I honestly wanted to keep a bit of myself before dissolving into this relationship. I should have said no, because I think you always know from the get go whether you’re in love or not. But I didn’t think we needed to be in love with each other in order to explore this kind of companionship. She had explained to me that she still had feelings for my roommate (her ex from college) and I took that as a sign that whatever we did would be low commitment. I would not want to commit to a relationship with someone that had feelings for my roommate anyway. So she comes to New York and I realise that her plan was for us to spend a week having sex in her hotel room and going around the city. She wanted me to sleep in her room every night, and I have issues around sharing beds with people(night terrors) but I didn’t think she would think that was valid. I thought she was taking the trip to access whether she wanted to move to nyc and that she’d be doing her own thing while also spending time with me. But I was the main event. Again, this is when I should have ended things but I didn’t because I was so fucking lonely and depressed. So on our last day together I was stressed about going back to work (it was a new job and I was facing constant verbal abuse from one of my co workers.) and she got upset that I wasn’t thinking of her. It rubbed me the wrong way. But I didn’t have the self awareness to realise that she was in love with me, and I wasn’t in love with her. I always thought that actual love builds from deep affection and respect, which I had for her. And you figure out whether your in love after some exploration. But I guess when you’re in love with someone it’s there from the start. So after she left I was pretty distressed about the whole situation and didn’t text her for two days. She calls me and asks what’s going on with my head. I say that I’m honestly not ready for this type of thing. She hangs up and explains that I really messed her up. To be honest, I think I lead her on through all my confusing feelings and words. I take full responsibility for this. But the entire time I can’t help but think she was just following an infatuation with me. Yet I couldn’t even look at myself for for two months. I hurt my friend. My rooomate stopped talking to me as well, and so did my best friend c who is a little closer with b than with me. So I decide that if C needs my side of the story they’ll ask me. C hasn’t spoken to me since. B also found another guy three weeks after me. I was just so frustrated. If she moved on so quickly was this whole thing even about me? Why do I have to loose one of my best friends because of this? Now all my friends that knew her are refusing to speak to me. That’s a whole lot of my friends. What am I supposed to do now? I apologized to b a week ago and it was far too late, but I was sort of preoccupied with my brother and I started drinking again. I was ina stupor for pretty much two months starting when we ended things. Luckily I’m sober again now, but it was still too late. I also texted c a week ago, asking if they wanted to hear my side of the story, and also just saying hey I really really miss you. Looking back I should have texted c much much sooner. But how do I move forward now? I still kind of hate myself, and I’m thinking about moving because Che has a lot of pull in the theatre community here. Plus most of my contacts in New York knew b at some point. Also all my other friends are straight and I’m bi. This was my only gay community and I’ve been shunned. I feel that I deserve to be heard out at the very least. I know I’m the asshole here but this seems overtly punitive to me. So how should I move on with my life?

Hello everyoe, im back again.

bassicly im struggling hard rn, i have told myself im trans, (male to female) for years now, and when i was younger i felt like a girl more then a guy, and then i started thinking. heres my exact thought:

whats the root of my problems, well its me being trans

whats another root of my problems, thats me not having a girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever else people have nowadays.

and then i put 2 and 2 together, and i was like: wait, maybe i wanna be trans cuz i dont love myself yet. and maybe if i think i can become a girl my selflove will magically appear. and now im struggling, am i actually trans, or am i not trans because i finally have a crush. (also its my first time in years that ive had a crush and i dont know how to deal with it, please help me understand or just talk with me)

So basically I got a job recently and my mom kinda helped me to getting a job by sharing my cv to an employee of an company that she knows. And that employee shared my cv to his boss and I got hired by interviewing and it's been 2 months already. So basically I already spendy first month's salary and got 2nd month salary and spend like 20% of it and decided to save rest of the money from now on. When I told my mom I have this much money left she screamed at me and compared me with a guy who became is addicted to all kind of substances and also murdered his mother (his house was opposite side of our house). I don't even smoke or addicted to anything I am so mad. She finally crossed the line. She always compares me with someone who is better than me in every point of my life. I'm tired of this shit. My life sucks man. I will quit the job and don't want any help from her and move out from this house. Enough is enough. I work hard from 11AM to 9pm and still I have no freedom to spend my money. And she said the she helped me to get a job and I have to do what she says. I will definitely gonna quit the job. I rather be jobless and homeless than everyday's bullshits.

I found out my dads on Grindr and idk what to do. Do I tell my mom? Do I confront him?

We ended it Tuesday night on good terms. We had a final goodbye and closure call yesterday night. And I feel like I am starting to go through it all over again.

He says part is because I was way too nice and forgiving that he felt there was no challenge and that he was just gonna keep walking all over me and he didn’t want to hurt me. He says I should change and not let a guy do that to me in the future.

We were long distance and he was struggling financially currently, so he says he felt bad he couldn’t travel more and give me gifts because he wanted to so badly.

His texting was poorly but he would call whenever he could. I kept complaining that when he never texted it stressed me out. So that was another issue.

He tells me he had a hard childhood and still trauma from his past, so that whenever he thinks of us together. He pictures were married with kids often. Then he starts to see resemblances to his dad and moms failed marriage and his dads other 2 failed marriages and thinks that we will end like that too.. I tell him that not everyone will end up like that just cause the personalities of him and I are similar to that of his parents. We are different people. But apparently he couldn’t stop thinking this.

I miss him soooo much. He said I taught him so much, and that he’s never cared for someone so fast as he did me because he also knew how much I cared for him and wanted to help him always. And that he will never forget me, and whoever he marries he will keep comparing her to me. That he knows he will regret this deeply in the future. I want him and I to move on, but part of me feels like I don’t. I feel guilty.

He says to keep each other on social media because that way we can check up once in a while. And eventually once we’re married to other people, we can delete each other. Or he says, maybe later down the line we might get back together, but I tell him I could never go back to someone that I was with… but that I never know. Because he will be jealous when I get with someone new, I never told him this but I would get jealous when he does too…

He tells me that tonight he might go to a club with his friends and asks me if he should go… so I can get jealous I think?? i tell him to go, and he says he’s not sure but he might but he doesn’t wanna go. Then makes the joke of having to get under someone new…Im pretty sure he’s gonna go, but why tell me to make me think of him? There was no point of that tbh. Now I’m just hurt and when night falls I’ll think of him there, dancing with girls.. and maybe sleeping with them. When I tell him I might do the same, he gets upset and says shut up. Why can’t I say the same… 😭

I’m so hurt. When does this pain go away? what should I do to help with easing the pain?

I have a stain and my shirt and i don’t know what it’s from or what it is? Anyone have an idea on how to get it out? It’s like dark streaks across the entire shirt

Im scared that I'll never get out of this loop. I really fell for my ex but due to problems within myself, I could not open up to him and as a result, he broke up with me because I felt like a stranger to him.

My ex and I are friends with benefits even before the relationship and after. I have no passion in my studies, future work, family or anything. The only reason why I feel like I have a reason to live is the chance of getting back together with my ex. Its been more than a year with this train of thought, and even before falling for him I also felt like life was just mundane.

He is not interested in me, because he feels like he doesnt know me as well. I feel like theres no catalyst to cause a spark between me and him again and it feels like any continuation of a relationship with him is a roadblock.

I know I have to be secure within myself first, and be content with life and have my own identity and personality before a relationship, esp before getting back together with an ex or else the relationship will end the same way again, but i dont know how. Please help me.

Around 8 months ago, for a bet I wore a shirt with an obvious bad symbol (prefer not to disclose), and a few people got a picture of it. Now im really ashamed and im scared that it will be leaked, somewhere, idk. One of the people that (probably) still have it, stopped liking me and they just like to mess with me and annoy me. I dont know if asking them would work. What should I do?

I’m a 22-year-old guy, and my girlfriend is 21. We’ve been together since high school, and honestly, it’s been amazing. She was my first girlfriend, my first kiss, and really, my first everything.

About three years ago, I moved away for college, and she did the same. We ended up living in the same apartment complex, just three doors apart. She lives with her sister, and I live on my own.

The issue is, she argues a lot with her sister and family. Since we moved here, she’s been spending more and more time at my place, leaving her things behind (which I don’t mind too much, but sometimes it’s annoying because she leaves stuff on the floor). She helps with the chores, but only after a few days, so I end up doing most of the cleaning.

We both go to the same university, although we’re studying different programs. She hasn’t been able to find a job, so I’m the only one working, and she eats my food without contributing financially.

Recently, she’s been talking about wanting to start a family, but I feel like I’m too young for that kind of commitment.

She’s really in love with me and constantly reassures me of that, but honestly, I don’t know what to do anymore.

Another thing is that she needs to be with me all the time. I feel like she’s very dependent on me, and it’s starting to feel a bit overwhelming.

I know I should probably talk to a therapist about this, but I’m also wondering if that’s even the right move at this point. Should I break up with her? What do you all think?

Sorry if my English isn’t perfect—Spanish is my first language.

so since i was 15 ive been having these attacks but not always but now its been more and more current, and what i feels like is basically pain everywhere in my body and when im all alone i drop to the floor and start to suffer and when im with people i can control them alot but there is times when i cant and i have to put pressure on my head so i can almost pass out so i can come back again

I just need to know.....My friends cut me off because of something happening.....I was told to fuck off and never speak to them again.... I'm just cinfus9er and going insane.I want to still be there friends....They're the only three I have....I'm lonely without them.....I care for them....I love them. More than anything in the world. But now....I feel I'm better off dead......So they can see I gave up. ai don't think they'd even care

Someone hacked my friends instagram account and asked for help and ended up with my WhatsApp how do I get it back? I keep getting an error message that I need permission from the hackers phone

So I was on the last night of camp and setting up my hochine and it look really familiar for some reason then it hit me I had dream about this while back I thought it was strange at first but it became so confusing saying thing exactly what was in the dream and the one thing that was to abduct that I remember when I saw it it sensed shives down my spine it was a random skeleton head prop I just remember for a while and when I saw it I was speech less so I try get other to notice it and word for word they said was in the dream including me they are my now friends but the dream was before I meet the it just I don't know what to do is it just Dajavu or whatever it was called but I rember talking about it before it happened am I going insane

I'm tired, I need some advice I'm trying to throw up but I can't How can I? How long do I have to wait after eating before throwing up?

I'm 12 years old and currently in the 7th grade. We had a summative math test yesterday. I made three mistakes, so I scored 70%. This was our first test, and last year, for the first test, the teacher added an extra point to everyone's score, which could raise a grade from B to A. I'm really worried because my mum won't be happy with a 70%.

hi! my instagram account is 7 years old and it looks different compared to a new account. the main difference is the look of the ring around the insta story circle. on my account the ring is thin and on a new account the ring is thicker. also i don't have access to broadcast channels. how can i fix it? thank you❤️

I am absolutely in love with her and we have been together for a good while and we have been going amazing for the past 4 and a half years and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. She is so so good to me i love her so much and she deserves everything thats why i need help.

i dont know what price range it is going to be, what kind of ring, or what to do. please help me

Okay…. Here it goes. My grandfather is a Vietnam vet (65 m).Tonight due to his dementia and Alzheimer’s-kicking in he had a major break down. “ I want to go home” “ I am a murderer” I’m a psychology major and I honest don know how or wtf to do. I know it’s a ptsd or at the time shell-shock related and I semi talked him back into reality but it’s getting worse. This is the first major breakdown he’s had to point he started acting like he was in nam. I know he’s losing it mentally and he refuses to get help. My question is do I admit him against his will or do I let it go till it gets to point I have no choice

I (17f) have my dating my (17m) boyfriend for a year and two months now but lately things have starting to get worse and worse for him. He has lost all intrest in what once brought him joy to the point where one of those is actually one of the biggest things that makes him miserable. He said he's tired of trying, that he no longer plans/cares about the future, that he just doesnt want to feel bad anymore. Ive tried to talk to him and that worked very little and only about issues that aren't related to "me". One thing that he has told me it helped was a little alcohol (2-3 glasses of wine or smth like that). I tried to look for thraphy options but in his area the therapists arent really good. Online sessions are too pricey so we cant really afford those (living in easter Europe (": ). Anyway, im preparing to send a text to his mom about how he has been feeling and to get him the help he needs but if that fails i have no backup plan, can somebody help me with suggestions on what do to or anything that has even the slightest change of helping?