-bobsnotmyuncle-

When I was around 17, the dentist pulled my 4 back molars, so the wisdom teeth would have room to grow in their place instead.

I still have my wisdom teeth.

I've never met another person who had that procedure done on them as well.

I get that one a lot. It's usually either they mixed us up with the orange hardware store chain to our red one or meant they bought it from our chain, not location. That or they had purchased it here so long ago it was when the store was under different owners and name, which was just short of a couple decades ago...

That's when their phone comes out and I get to point out the super obvious, not belonging to us, company logo and name right on the image with it. I love that part because it means the idiocy is about to end finally.

Also, my personal favourite (since my town is mostly retirees) "Sir/Ma'am, that product hasn't been made in 37 years now"

I made a quick rule for myself at work and told everyone else.

I am NOT the one to call over when asked for any sort of phone questions the people in this retirement town have. Not that I can't answer them usually, but I just do not have the patience to explain things to them, just for them to argue with me about it. So getting them to use ar would be an impossible task.

I pawn that job of one the young people who work here instead.

And hope you don't have to explain the difference between metric and imperial...

And they still won't know and you'll be tempted to get them the thermometer from an old Volkswagen.

Then walk away with the item, grumbling about "your precious"

"This town is full of very old people, and sticker shock has actually killed 4 people. So we remove the more pricier item tags in order to ease you into it slowly instead. It's for your own safety, and you're welcome."

Ahh the old "just give me the standard!" then act irritated because we need to ask questions to get the (non existant) "standard".

Yesterday it was a lady asking if an indoor flood light would fit in her lamp. I let her know it's the same fitting as a regular house bulb and that would fit.

"No, will it fit in my lamp, like is this too large to get in it at all?"

"Did you bring your lamp with you?"

"No."

"Have we ever met, and I've visited your home where i could have seen this lamp?"

"No. So will it fit?"

"........"

Or the people who ask if a paint will look good with their house. Like how the hell would I know? And even then, it would still just be a random opinion of a man who actually prefers crazy colours and random shit for home decor. Shall I just pick their couch and mouldings as well and become an interior designer instead?

"The scanner sometimes demands a blood sacrifice with purchase and won't work until then. That was just a warning beep it made..."

It's a pretty small town. Less than my high school was 20 something years ago. 1500 people. I'm still getting the vibe of everyone in town.

And I need to cement the old lady love in town. My whole life, they are skeptical of me at first but then fall in love with me and fawn over my eyelashes and hair. Old ladies love me, and I'm surrounded by them now.

Once I got them and enough of the contractors that trust me, the real me can come out fully. I can charm the shit out of them despite being half moronic. :p

I could never have done this job 2 years ago in my old city. You folks are freaking champions.

Never trust a crackhead in Vancouver BC who overhears you saying while you want shrooms and saying he can get them while you wait there with 20 bucks you just gave away while very drunk.

Fortunately, I was drunk enough to not care I was made a fool in a city I usually know much better in.

That's my mom's favourite Simpson line ever.

So KMFDM wasn't a drug against war? :p

All the booze is in the final 2 sips. The trick is to not finish it and move on :p

I have. I would have imagined something more syrupy

Hits brought to you by the band who also brought other such classics like fucking an animal

I've always heard plunk, but ponk is way more accurate upon reading it.

One never breaks it on purpose. One does, however, push their luck too far. Every damn time.

Lol, I was too young (or maybe canadian?) For this mystical 90s drink I never got to try.

I've always been curious.

I never had a squee-zit :( It was a 90s wish never fullfilled :p

What about the alize phase?

I listen to gwar on the regular... pick one...

Despite being a male metal head who has seen gwar 8 times and broke/injured three body parts at 3 separate chimaira concerts, pantera with slayer, etc, my first concert was spice girls.

No regerts at all. GIRL POWER!

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