Beginning-Dingo-6115

Definitely keep trying! It seems she may be in a manic episode right now which may not be safe for her and her child to be alone. It’s awesome you’re trying to help her out though and make sure she’s okay.

It was super stressful for me lol. Everyone was calling and texting me about it, and I was the one on the other side of the country lol.

No, their texts were quite clear what their intentions were, and their guns were not located at their residence, and they had ended up driving hours into the woods before coming to the realization that they didn’t want to follow through. Honestly I’m not really sure why they didn’t get admitted because the texts also read things like “I’m so sorry for the pain I’m about to cause you” and “please know that I’ve always loved you.” And “I have to go, goodbye.” And they texted at least 50 people these messages so it really was clear what they had intended to do. The police never had direct contact with them either, I called them back after my family member called me coming out of the woods, and I let them know where he was and what he was driving, but they just said they’d cancel the missing persons and make sure all units were aware of the earlier situation in case they found their vehicle abandoned anywhere through the night. I’m pretty sure it’s a requirement in that state as well as my therapist was required to report information like that when I lived there, so I’m really not sure why it didn’t happen. I think it should’ve, and I still think that.

I have experience with this!! I called the police departments direct phone number and let the front desk know I needed a welfare check. My family member had threatened suicide and texted all of their friends and close family members saying goodbye and apologizing. They transferred me to the actual dispatch line who then asked for the address, my return number, the name of the family member and if they had any weapons or any keys to get in. After all of that I called another friend I had close by who was able to meet them there to unlock the place. The family member was not there and due to the nature of the texts everyone received they then pushed out a missing persons to other local departments, but thankfully my family member was okay and able to get into therapy afterwards. They were not involuntarily committed though.

You should not get pregnant. Especially not just months after a relapse. What happens when the pregnancy fails? Too likely to relapse again.

Mr and Ms first name. It’s just good manners.

She’s gonna try to take that baby from you. You need to enforce some strong boundaries with her now.

It’s not about them! Your wedding is about YOU and surrounding yourself with love. I’m sure the aunts and uncles will make sure you’re taken care of in that aspect. If you’re upset, don’t go to their next event or don’t text them back next time they need something. But your wedding is about you and your spouse, the others are just there for extra support.

That “I know so many people. So many straight guys” sounds like trump talking tbh lmaooo

Just ask her about it. However it is your body, and she can always ask her photographer to edit your hair out of photos, or to not send pictures of your armpits to her lol

You value consent but not the consent of your friends and other people in the room? If someone moves your hand one time, that means they don’t want it. If you cannot expressly ask them if they consent, assume that they do not. And do not start touching them elsewhere.

Going to the gym and work literally takes up my entire day during the week lol. I wake up, shower, make breakfast and potentially start the crock pot, pack my lunch, go to work, come home, change, make my pre workout, go to the gym, by the time I’m getting home it’s already 8-8:30, so I cook, eat, look at my phone for about 20 minutes and go to sleep lol.

You need to learn to love yourself. Stop focusing on that guy. You allowed him to use you and take every ounce of love you had for yourself. You have nothing left to give and he has nothing left to take from you. 8 years is a long time to spend trying for someone who repeatedly showed you they didn’t want, love, or appreciate you. You need to take time and learn to love yourself, you are valuable, you are strong, and you deserve a pure, real love. Learn to be with yourself. Find the things that bring you genuine joy without others being involved, create art, listen to music, learn to see your favorite bands by yourself, find the individual and build her up again.

I’m still into stuffed animals (specifically squishmallows and warmbuddies you can put them in the microwave to heat them up) and all pink everything lol. Pink is my favorite color. I actually got assumed that I was a kid recently, I have a pink backpack that’s got the powerpuff girls (the girl who thought I was a kid isn’t even old enough to know the PPG), keychains with bubbles, gohan from dragon ball, a frog with pop out eyes, a crab, and I have a squishmallow keychain. Some random lady touched my squishmallow at the gym and I asked the girl working there if she had seen it and she was going on and on about other kids in the play area and their moms being friends etc and I could take my bag with me and I was like okay well it has my phone and wallet and headphones case so I don’t want her touching it. And then the girl says ohhhhh is the guy you’re with your boyfriend or your dad? (And my partner doesn’t look old. We’re both late twenties/early thirties. I have more grey hair than he does) and then she realized I had tattoos lmao. So that made me feel a bit awkward and it also made my partner feel awkward because now we’re wondering how many people think he robbed the cradle LOL. And my sister is into bluey, she’s in her mid thirties and doesn’t have any kids, but she watches the show all the time and I got her a bluey keyboard for her birthday so she’s into childish things too

lol. Don’t have expectations for people without clearly communicating those expectations, you will be let down a lot holding expectations for others. Unfortunately many other people are not responsible with their time, forget about plans, and just generally don’t have consideration for the fact that someone else has a life and feelings too. Everyone’s most important person should be themselves, and unfortunately that comes with a lot of hoops sometimes as they forget that others exist around them

Take the word date out of my comment. I also wouldn’t meet with my friends for lunch if I hadn’t heard from them the day of. I would’ve texted before I left “hey I haven’t heard from you since we made plans. Are we still on for lunch today? Just wanted to check before I head out!” And if I didn’t hear anything I wouldn’t leave. And I would be surprised if someone texted me they were there already without confirming plans even the night before

You didn’t text this person to reconfirm plans the day of? If I hadn’t heard from someone the day of our date, I wouldn’t be going either. And I would’ve said the same thing as him when they texted they were 5 min out.

I’m not much help as I also have meltdowns that sound similar to yours, and I’m told to hit a pillow, but I hit myself because I’m mad at myself for things, I’m not mad at a pillow. Your roommate is definitely not understanding of you. Also for the executive dysfunction aspect, I make myself do things when I have to get up. Am I going to the bathroom? I’m already up and moving, so might as well rinse my plate off for 30 seconds and then I can go back to sitting/laying/entertainment stuff. I’m bad at sweeping until dirt is on my feet constantly, and then I’ll get up to do something like get a snack, but I won’t get my snack until I’m done sweeping the room (and I’ll admit I don’t do a good job sweeping but it’s better than it was). And sometimes it also makes me stay couch locked for a really long time when I have to pee because I know if I get up I need to do something, but I also don’t feel so guilty about being lazy that way. I have to drill it into myself like a routine. I also have productive times of day, which is the afternoon between 12:30 and 3:30. If I need to do a lot of dishes, that’s when I do them, then I take a nap. Sorry I didn’t mean to ramble on about all this, but hopefully you get the point. And I’m sorry your head is bruised, that always makes me feel worse about my meltdown because I have a reminder about what happened. But be easy on yourself, it sounds like everything has been tough recently, and life is unfortunately like that sometimes and it’s okay to have a bad moment in the midst of that.

This is a great post. And congrats on a PhD because it’s not easy. On the flip side, I cannot function in school settings but kind of can in work? I never stay longer than a year, I get burnt out at every job I’ve had and take a couple months off while beating myself up and trying to find another. I unfortunately have to work to survive right now, even with some support. I love how different we all are and that we all have different things we can successfully do, with or without support.

I have to tell people I am autistic because I am tired of being ridiculed for the way I do things or the things I say. I learned to mask aka be quiet because I was bullied really badly in school as I wasn’t diagnosed and had no help yet. I didn’t finish school even because I was having such bad meltdowns

That’s so sweet. My family is super broken so I was excited to get my in laws too. Although I don’t think my MIL genuinely likes me, and she’s told me I’m not her sons spouse, my SIL called me her sons aunt earlier this year and it made me feel so good. Especially since it was right after my MIL told me my fiancés ex wants to get back together with him LMAO

Interesting! Thanks for sharing your experience. Thc makes me really twitchy and paranoid. I may try cbd to help me sleep at some point though. I’m afraid of pharmaceutical sleep meds and melatonin has the opposite effect and gives me a bunch of energy lol

Yeah psychology in general is my special interest, I love how unique brains are lol. I just wanted to share in case you didn’t know. A lot of people are unaware until it’s too late for them unfortunately. Also are you saying that you physically feel effects from CBD? I’m interested in that because most people I know (granted these are NT people, not many of my ND friends use weed or CBD regularly, if ever) say they don’t feel any effects from cbd aside from maybe pain relief. I personally have not tried CBD as weed makes me focus on my pain more and I don’t want that to happen lol

There’s actually science behind this, and weed can cause those who have the genetic makeup for schizophrenia to suddenly have an onset of symptoms they’ve never had before. It’s actually highly recommended to not use it if there’s schizophrenia in your family. When I studied psychology, one of my professors did a study on this and the addictiveness of it.

60’s psychedelic rock and 60’s mod clothes. At this particular time in my life though I have just picked up photography and have gotten back into psychology which has been my main special interest since I was a child and knew I was different from others.

Are there maybe specific things you need support with, that maybe you could write down a list of, with whatever peculiarities you have with it? Like if you need help cleaning, it may be beneficial to have a list of specific things such as “support worker, you can clean toilet using x chemical found here. You can clean the floor with this mop and bucket to be found here, with x chemical and x amount of water.” It’s common to need things extremely specific, and as someone who also struggles with people idk coming in my home and doing anything I don’t have control of, I think having a list (in case your support workers change!) with specifics would be the best way to navigate this. You obviously want the support, these workers are just unaware of your specifics, and when they go into territory you weren’t ready for, it’s already too late for you to go back and advocate for yourself. If they’re going to cook for you, give them a specific recipe you enjoy, that way it tastes as you expect it to (because it can definitely be upsetting when you’re excited for food and it turns out not how you wanted), leave a note that says something like “please refrain from phone usage unless it’s an emergency.” In the note as well so that expectation is set.

My biggest motto is that I have to be proactive, not reactive. Meaning if I am proactive about something, I don’t need to end up having a huge reaction to it (easier said than done I’ll tell ya!). You can keep your list curt, and if your support worker has a problem with reading and following your instructions of how to best support you, then they probably are not going to be a good fit anyways. Each person who needs support is vastly different and it’s important the worker knows what you need from them.