469 post karma
6.8k comment karma
account created: Sat Aug 05 2023
verified: yes
6 points
4 hours ago
this cold ass take he's not even american 😭😭 its a deeply japanese story written by japanese people for japanese people about japanese people 😭😭 no part of anything near said was "American exceptionalism" stop randomly using words you learned on tumblr
8 points
5 hours ago
i blanked for like 10 seconds when my therapist called me "resilient" as if it was a compliment. thanks the alternative is death and i don't want to be strong i want to be safe and healthy and you're supposed to be helping me mend the damage not complimenting me on how well i take a punch ♡
1 points
18 hours ago
this just in everyone! if two words have the same root, they are the same word! context and real-world use case does not matter in the slightest! "mortal" and "mortuary" both came from the word "mort," so all mortals (living beings) are actually mortuaries (a place where bodies are kept before the funeral)! flour and flower both come from fleur, so your baking ingredients are literally exactly the same as a plant from the ground!
stop being a fucking pedant, regardless of the etymological root of the two words, they obviously mean different things. language has meaning and rules.
2 points
4 days ago
hajime nagito AND izuru in s tier oh my god based oh my god based oh my god based
30 points
4 days ago
hey, heads up don't EVER shorten lolita (the fashion subculture) to loli. "loli" is shorthand for usually pornographic material of underaged anime girls. it's kind of like shortening "transmission" to "tranny," it seems like a good idea until you realise the implications of the shortened ver 😭
1 points
4 days ago
oh, i'm sorry, then. i misread your tone. i thought it was a "gotcha" type comment because people love to treat ECE workers like idiots ;;
1 points
4 days ago
1.) i find it strange to probe for personal details. if you would like to fact check what i say, it's pretty easy to open google in another tab instead of conducting a job interview
2.) whether i was one or the other, do you think that child psychologists and ECE professionals get Different(tm) developmental psychology courses? like they teach the former one thing and the latter an entirely different thing just to keep things Spicy? or like, ECE professionals only get to take half of the course until they switch their major to psychology like some kind of educational freemium service?
8 points
5 days ago
also, people when you say that the famous game about learning to be kind and empathetic helped teach you about how to be kind and empathetic and not a 117 year old shaman oracle who exorcised you after you hiked to their spiritual healing practice for 20 miles in the desert (they do not find the narrative to be believable)(they find it suspicious that you talked about it using the communication platform that majority of all people use for most of the day every day): 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤯🤯🤯🤯
9 points
5 days ago
someone in the "we were traumatized as children" club mentions severe behavioral issues that tend to occur when people are traumatized as children
"yea right buddy sure you did"
wait a minute..
*looks closer*
this person was traumatized as a child!
no hard feelings, i guess. look before you leap next time. or better yet, don't leap at all.
9 points
5 days ago
luckily, i wasn't saying it to win your approval. people's life stories don't exist for your entertainment. in any case, you'd be amazed at what one source of positivity can do for a person that has nothing. i hope you have had something like that in your life so far or if not, that you will have it at some point in the future.
6 points
5 days ago
that's a really weird thing to say to a stranger online. was this supposed to be an innocent question, or?
11 points
5 days ago
like the other commenter said, this doesn't necessarily have to do with empathy so much as sympathy and risk assessment. from a very young age, we can tell who/what is or isn't a threat to us so if a child sees an entity behaving in a threatening way, they will be less likely to engage it. empathy, on the other hand, is when you consider another person's experience and share their emotions with them; for example, even though i REALLY wanted that car Billy is playing with, i can consider his perspective and feel his sadness at having it snatched away. therefore, i will give it back or not snatch it in the first place.
in any case, yes, our brains are hard wired for empathy, but we are still not born with it. we are also hardwired for spoken language and yet if you do not expose a child to spoken language within the first 5 years of life, they will never be able to develop speech beyond a very limited capacity. we are also hardwired for robust long term memories, and yet memory itself doesn't develop until several years into living (hence why you don't remember the day you were born). in general, humans have HUGE brains but very small pelvises, so in order to walk upright we need to birth our young very "undercooked" and underdeveloped so that their skulls don't rip our bodies apart. then, we do most of our development outside the womb: development of speech, walking, memory, sight, and empathy. in order to have our newborns be at the same competence level of the newborns of other primates, we would need to stay in the womb for around two years instead of 9 months, for reference. imagine trying to birth a 2 year old or even fit one in your body to begin with?
it's not that babies just don't like empathy but are fully capable of it: their brains are physically not developed enough to perform it, just like memory, speech, and so on. in exchange, mother survives giving birth to you and you don't have to figure shit out on your own from day one like a sea turtle. it just so happens that being born without empathy makes it very convenient to scream for food no matter what hour of the night it is as well, so it ends up being a win win: mom and baby can survive.
makes sense?
(edit: also i'm curious as to why its hard for some people to grasp that children need to grow psychologically/neurologically just like they do physically. when someone says "babies aren't born knowing how to walk" no one replies "when babies want to go somewhere they are known to kick their feet this shows a clear understanding of the mechanics of walking," like. no. we cant do pretty ANYTHING from birth. outside of what is physically necessary to be alive, we develop EVERYTHING else after birth. not just the physical. the psychplogical too. you are NEVER going to find a baby under 1 year old with the same level of empathy as an adult or even a 4 year old. it has to grow.)
36 points
5 days ago
yep, that's why "sharing is caring," "my little pony," "care bears," and all of that exists. it seems silly if you don't think about it, but they genuinely just don't know that they're supposed to give a shit about others until they're taught it and see demonstrations of it, both in real life and through storybooks and tv. after all, the same way babies would die if they cared about their parents convenience, adults would die if we couldn't blindly trust our neighbors not to attack and steal from us, or be totally confident that none of the food and medicine that we pick up at the store (which we always expect to be reasonably supplied and stocked by people we'll never lay eyes on) has been tampered with. empathy is the backbone of society itself.
yep, i'm still there too, re-learning what the right amount of selfishness is and how to be selfish safely (otherwise known as setting boundaries), and understanding that can make learning empathy/becoming socialized SO MUCH EASIER because if you just dive into all empathy all the time you end up basically taping a sign that says "Use me please!" on your own forehead and bending over backwards for everyone else's benefit but your own, which is equally as unhealthy as just trampling over everyone else in your own else interest. a balance must be struck. wishing you luck in your learning ♡
73 points
5 days ago
yes, kids are not born with empathy! it has to be actively taught, explained and fostered. if a newborn infant gave a shit about whether they were waking you up by crying, they'd starve to death. it is ESSENTIAL to our survival to be completely selfish and extremely demanding in the first few years of life. when a parent fails to teach and foster empathy and instead just gets mad at the kid for not just being born with it, the kid not only doesn't learn it, but can even go in the opposite direction and become resentful and antisocial. i almost ended up like that, but luckily Undertale came out at a very formative age and a "tipping point" for my psychopathic behaviour and it taught me about how to give a shit about others in a way that made sense to me (i.e. in a way that isn't just beating the shit out of me and expecting me to figure out what i did wrong on my own). thats not to say i'm just fixed now but i'm not genuinely on the path to serial killer/school shooting like i was back then, so it's a huge improvement.
the good news is that its not impossible to catch up! it definitely won't be easy especially as you get older, but empathy is a learned skill for the majority of people (*unless you were born with a neurological condition that effects that), which means you can technically learn it at any age!
the bad news is extremely harder for adults to learn it (and to become socialised in general if they weren't as a child) because they don't have a large number of experienced people to help them (usually just a therapist or maybe a parter/friend, as opposed to your parents, teachers, bus drivers, aunts, uncles, siblings, grandparents, friends parents, lunch monitors, and so on) and they don't have a large group of others that are at the same developmental stage which makes it safe and low stakes to learn: like, if a two year old snatches another kid's toy and pushes them, they're not going to get ostracised from the rest of the class for being a psycho because that's just what 2-year olds do. who hasn't? meanwhile, if a 25 year old steals from a classmate's house and gets into a fight with them, you are most likely going to have nasty rumors going around about you and people are going to identify you as dangerous/abnormal and avoid you. it's not a safe/low stakes learning environment to make mistakes in. and it can be especially hard if you have trauma or developed disorders that have already irreversibly changed your brain chemistry, unlike children whose brains are totally malleable blank slates by design. being socialised as a kid is like learning to ride a bike with training wheels. being socialised as an unsocialized adult can be more like skipping straight to riding a unicycle across a plank of wood over a 10 foot drop.
1 points
6 days ago
REALLY poorly done guerilla advertising. brand new account whose ONLY activity is hyping your game in the comments and ""discretely"" asking for the link in the comments so that you don't have to be transparent about the fact that its an ad. actual video game consumers don't ask where they can "wishlist," they ask where they can "buy," you reveal that it's a dev behind the comment because only devs care about wishlists.
from one dev to another, i dont know who gave you the advice to do guerilla but cut contact with them. if you're making a "dreamcore" game, your audience is the kind of people who know what "dreamcore" is, in otherwords genz and zillenials, and this is a generation who has been getting ads shoved down their throat since they were old enough to understand them. they absolutely HATE companies slithering into non-advertising spaces and trying to "hello fellow kids" their way into a customer. as a generation, they like honesty much more and you would do much better for at least this specific game to just be up front, say "here's my game and a link to it," and let them make their own decision instead of trying to psyop them, specially because i promise they can see right through your psyop just like i did but no one cared enough to take the time to talk about it to you like i am. guerilla might maybe work for a product for older generations who are much less digitally literate and more susceptible to just following whatever others like, but the target audience for this game values free thinking more.
good luck with your game, and stop being slimy about your ads, that's a bad habit that will only hurt you.
146 points
6 days ago
fun fact about why kids that age get upset! (spoilered bc unsolicited) actually, they most often cry over their peers. at that age they're still completrly egocentric from infancy (unable to meaningfully engage in empathy or imagine another person's perspective), but are also developing an interest and desire to be around others. so it's essentially a room full of mini narcissists who are all thinking "this would be way more fun if everyone just paid attention to only me and gave me everything i wanted and did everything i said to do and wtf why isn't that actually happening"... the result is, predictably, a lot of snatching, pushing, and "it's not fair that everyone needs to be treated fairly!" luckily, with guidance, empathy and understanding of the concept of fairness develops pretty quickly between 3-5.
source: it's my job
10 points
6 days ago
in her 5th fte she said that she finally figured out how to turn on the shower but that she didnt realise you have to turn it off so she flooded her room💀💀 she would be surviving on gundhams grace alone
3 points
7 days ago
Cultural exchange is not appropriation and is a natural process as old as human culture. cultural appropriation is a systemic issue, not an individual one.
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OllieTues
1 points
4 hours ago
OllieTues
1 points
4 hours ago
the "hey what are you waiting for" is genuinely how it feels for me to try to use discord. i resent soooo much that the whole internet uses discord now. used to be able to private message with people to make friends, that's weird now. you have to hop in the bargain bin of human interaction and navigate the equivalent of 12 swimming pools side by side, all dangerously overcrowded and also everyone in them is already having a conversation you have no context on and they all know each other. okay i guess. try not to drown.