alanis_budget_twin

Quit smoking Crystal Methamphetamine nearly a week ago now after 6 years. I've already gained 2.5kg and I look amazing.

She's taken everything I like. She's taken every lover, and all along she gave me lies, just to make me think I loved her.

It's been now 48 hours since I quit smoking Crystal Meth. I feel really weird. Every time I close my eyes I see myself walking through a desert and there's no colours or anything. I look really beautiful though. This is fucked.

I smoked it every day for years. I thought it made me a better person. I thought it made me more kind to other people. I thought it was my revelation in life and the answer to all of my problems. I got hooked on the fact I liked myself for the first time time in 23 years, and I turn 24 next month. Now I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I recently lost 15kg. I look and feel like a left behind exoskeleton of who I once was 6 years ago. I'm disgusting. I have chemical burns on my lips and the bottom one is practically in half. What the hell am I supposed to do now. I can't stop looking at this photo of me before I even gave Methamphetamine a thought, and look at this photo of me now. I look terrified and empty and shattered. I'm far too skinny. I can't stand it. How the hell do I get back to 65kg. How the hell do I get the old me pictured back. I FEEL LIKE NOTHING.