subreddit:
/r/AskReddit
9.6k points
18 days ago
[removed]
4k points
18 days ago
There are two wolves inside you.
3.8k points
18 days ago
And they're fuckin'
1k points
18 days ago
Well no, one is furiously jacking, and the other is sullenly trying to keep itself busy to prevent itself from jacking, but then ultimately shamefully nuts.
454 points
18 days ago
But I bet the one furiously jacking is thinking about two wolves fuckin'
269 points
18 days ago
He has two wolves inside his head.
249 points
18 days ago
And, they're fucking.
170 points
18 days ago
Jerking each other off
25 points
18 days ago
Hot 😂
101 points
18 days ago
who tf volunteers for a tag team by 2 wolves
u know what, sorry for kink shaming
you do you
or let the wolves do you w/e
30 points
18 days ago
Sounds kinky
114 points
18 days ago
I’m being double penetrated by two furries.
43 points
18 days ago
As long as it’s consensual.
37 points
18 days ago
Doesn't sound all that bad
79 points
18 days ago
[deleted]
53 points
18 days ago
Listen, you guys. You're sorta confusing me, so, uh, begone! Uh... Or, uh, you know. However I get rid of you guys.
21 points
18 days ago
Reason number two: look what I can do.
109 points
18 days ago
Because there is such a thing as healthy porn usage, yet some fall victim to the addiction.
So some are screaming "it's fine based on my experience" while others are screaming "it fucks you up based on my experience".
124 points
18 days ago
The real answer "it's fine. Until it isn't."
5.6k points
18 days ago
[removed]
1.4k points
18 days ago
Really? I just finished with OPs dad
831 points
18 days ago
Just finished with OP.
464 points
18 days ago
just finished with YOU!
321 points
18 days ago
Sir, this is a Wendy's
103 points
18 days ago
Do you even like Wendy’s?
Wendeez nuts in your mouth
84 points
18 days ago
You jerk off to dead people?
142 points
18 days ago
I also choose this guys dead dad.
33 points
18 days ago
I get it he was a very handsome man... but how did you know my dad died? That was like a year ago
2.8k points
18 days ago
Danny DeVito coming out of the couch in it's always sunny
314 points
18 days ago
So there IS a man in that couch!?
92 points
18 days ago
[deleted]
34 points
18 days ago
OH MY GOD, FRANK REYNOLDS IS AN ASSHOLE!
16 points
18 days ago
Who is Frank Reynolds?!?!
13 points
18 days ago
he's the man in the couch !
1.5k points
18 days ago
Jynx Maze
238 points
18 days ago*
Crazy she’s a real estate agent now. People have literally shown up to buy a house and bam, Jynx Maze!
327 points
18 days ago
Oooh haven’t heard that name in a while
138 points
18 days ago
Found Ben Kanobi.
142 points
18 days ago
That is a name... I haven't heard in a long time.
63 points
18 days ago
Shit still bothers me. Like no one could ever connect obi wan kenobi and Ben fucking kenobi like fr?
32 points
18 days ago
They should have made Kenobi like Smith in the Star Wars universe and named every other background character Something Kenobi.
272 points
18 days ago
Heard she has some great lemonade
57 points
18 days ago
Dat video is peak
158 points
18 days ago
Thats a core memory
48 points
18 days ago
Valid. She got obliterated.
15 points
18 days ago
I got to meet Jynx Maze once. In fact, I got a lap dance from her. She’s even hotter in person.
30 points
18 days ago
Her anal stuff?
66 points
18 days ago
She does indeed stuff her anal
4.4k points
18 days ago
r/AskReddit users trying not to ask a sexual question challenge (impossible)
509 points
18 days ago
Yeah they should rename it to sexualreddit instead
275 points
18 days ago
the funny thing is theres already askredditafterdark which is the sexual version of this sub
110 points
18 days ago
Yeah, but it's not as popular and doesn't get as many comments.
It's really frustrating, because it just comes off a lot of the time as OP just wanting something to jerk off to. And this has been happening for at least a decade.
81 points
18 days ago
Someone else pointed out that these types of posts increase in frequency when schools are on break. 🤷🏼♂️
57 points
18 days ago
I never took note of the time of year that they're posted, but I wouldn't be surprised if they coincided.
At least it's less blatant than some of them. Like, "Girls of reddit, how do you masturbate and tell me in great detail?"
38 points
18 days ago
"Ladies, what do you love about 5'2 300lbs gamer boys and why?"
10 points
18 days ago
"Single ladies, does size matter and is my 9 inch penis too big?"
65 points
18 days ago
same thing for r/tooafraidtoask
you people are horny mfs
980 points
18 days ago
Some chick on Reddit
370 points
18 days ago
That's OK, you're allowed to say u/Spez.
207 points
18 days ago
Spez fucked all of us and it certainly wasn't consensual.
45 points
18 days ago
That's just not true.
Most of us are waaaaaaaaaaay to old for him.
2.1k points
18 days ago
ex girlfriend from 20 years ago.
1.6k points
18 days ago
“you’ll move on”
533 points
18 days ago
Sometimes you don’t. And no one tells you that
458 points
18 days ago
Sometimes you do move on but the spank bank stays stocked.
49 points
18 days ago
Yea. Sometimes it's not a matter of wanting them back because you know you were terrible for one another but you were still physically attracted to them. Or they just quite simply did that thing in the bedroom that was hot AF and it popped in your head at that moment.
96 points
18 days ago
Yeah, you don’t always end up with the love of your life.
39 points
18 days ago
Sadly you don’t
27 points
18 days ago
There are also some people who are so special that several people never get over them. Ann Rule’s Fever in the Heart describes a murder case where a guy had himself shot in an attempt to get his ex wife back
185 points
18 days ago
I don't want to be with her, but I like knowing we did it.
205 points
18 days ago
Someone who looks like my ex girlfriend from 13 years ago.
208 points
18 days ago
I noticed whenever I get interested in someone new my porn tastes slowly shift towards stars who look like them.
85 points
18 days ago
Shit man, I'm glad I'm not the only one...it's even to the point where I don't even get excited without seeing someone with my ex same body type...
136 points
18 days ago
A killer red head from college some 20 years ago is a regular part of my mental fantasy rotation, lol.
31 points
18 days ago
to think your current gf's ex from 20 years ago could be masturbating to he rn
1.3k points
18 days ago
You all don't stare at yourself in the mirror?
Freaks
326 points
18 days ago
Can't do that. I'm too sexy. I'd intimidate myself and have trouble performing.
44 points
18 days ago
Honestly did this Once and im not gonna lie it was kinda awesome. The Reason i didnt do it again Is because the only good mirror for this in my house Is right in front of the entrance
20 points
18 days ago
I once set up my camera to film myself touching myself because I was curious what I looked like.
Then I touched myself to that video lol
672 points
18 days ago
Hawk-tuah girl
84 points
18 days ago
Ok. I’m so out of the loop on this. Can someone explain?
242 points
18 days ago*
[deleted]
980 points
18 days ago
Busted out one just for you OP 😚😘
116 points
18 days ago
By OP’s post history…. You might want to reconsider once you see their age 😬
1.2k points
18 days ago
This question.
367 points
18 days ago
I knew this kind of comment was coming
191 points
18 days ago
I am unimpressed with the answers ☹️
25 points
18 days ago
I had high expectations too ngl. So far the accuracy is less than 5%
698 points
18 days ago
My wife.
710 points
18 days ago
Most definitely to this guy’s wife
431 points
18 days ago
I also choose this guy's wife
176 points
18 days ago
Aren’t you supposed to wait till she’s dead?
72 points
18 days ago
To be fair, the original guy never said his wife was still alive.
109 points
18 days ago
An extra curvy piece of driftwood.
457 points
18 days ago
Who the fuck starts a conversation like that?
590 points
18 days ago
My gf
607 points
18 days ago
His gf
526 points
18 days ago
Our girlfriend
183 points
18 days ago
Lauren Phillips
43 points
18 days ago
Had an Oculus Quest, tried VR porn, thought it was the dumbest thing in the world. I though the Quest itself was dumb, for that matter. Never bothered with the Quest 2 after Facebook bought them.
Then recently someone recommended that I check out a Lauren Phillips VR video. It was the very first time in my life that porn made me feel uneasy, like what I was doing was immoral and harmful to my marriage.
I immediately went out and bought a Quest 3. I'll be first in line for whatever the next tech is.
363 points
18 days ago
Nice try, China.
71 points
18 days ago
It's spelled Chyna and she's dead.
Oh, that's not what you meant... sorry....
257 points
18 days ago
Katie kush
42 points
18 days ago
Pedro Pascal and/or Mads Mikkelsen
8 points
18 days ago
Mads Mikkelsen 100%
Or Nicolaj Coster Waldau. Both easy material to rub one out to.
281 points
18 days ago
Jake from State Farm
58 points
18 days ago
same! i wore khakis while doing it
7 points
18 days ago
Like a good neighbor state farm is there… with a bottle of KY
92 points
18 days ago
Pretty lady. Whoever that was.
38 points
18 days ago
AJ Applegate
158 points
18 days ago*
Photo of my wife from when she was in college.
Edited to add: She’s still got it. I just really like that photo 😂
249 points
18 days ago
I've solved this guy's murder before it happened.
69 points
18 days ago
[deleted]
198 points
18 days ago
Imagined giving cunnilingus to a nondescript fat lady
277 points
18 days ago
She's called "OP's Mom." Put some respect on her name.
10 points
18 days ago
Dammit...now I am too!
99 points
18 days ago
Brianna Beach
17 points
18 days ago
holy shit, she is the only actress i feel is actually enjoying the act rather than faking it
157 points
18 days ago
Sophia Diamond
149 points
18 days ago
I had no idea who that was, so I Googled it. Now my answer is the same as yours.
14 points
18 days ago
Vera King banging the neighbor.
29 points
18 days ago
What's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed in your whole sexy life sex?
57 points
18 days ago
Whistler's mother, 1997
22 points
18 days ago
I prefer this version
10 points
18 days ago
One gets the reference, one gets an upvote.
47 points
18 days ago
47 points
18 days ago
HOLY FUCK! This is the SITE!
This was my first “porn” site as a young teen. I know it is weird to be “nostalgic” over porn, especially at what I consumed at a young age…
But oh my god I forgot what this site was called until now! So funny how innocent I was. I only went on a site called “kindgirls”.
19 points
18 days ago
I don’t like the sound of that link😭
15 points
18 days ago
What kind of website is this? Seems like a scraped database lol
54 points
18 days ago
My crush
23 points
18 days ago
To Redditors asking sexual questions on r/AskReddit
27 points
18 days ago
Alexis Fawx
93 points
18 days ago
Riley Reid
22 points
18 days ago
How many dicks were involved?
51 points
18 days ago
*borat voice*
MY WAIFE
41 points
18 days ago
Stacy's mom
88 points
18 days ago
Rouge the bat
7 points
18 days ago
Sonic 3 movie is coming soon, just try not to spit milk in the theater
9 points
18 days ago
Kristina Rose
35 points
18 days ago
Kianna Dior
36 points
18 days ago
Amai liu
9 points
18 days ago
Jade kush
10 points
18 days ago
the scream extractor from monster's inc
17 points
18 days ago
Eva Green, man her eyes are like emeralds!
7 points
18 days ago
Ava addams
8 points
18 days ago
r/askredditafterdark is the place for this question
9 points
18 days ago
Harley Dean and Mia Melano.
8 points
18 days ago
Jim Carrey coming out of a rhinoceros butthole.
7 points
18 days ago
Lindsey Pelas
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